Divorced, Widowed, Single, or Married: Financial Planning for Women

In this episode, Ronald Blue Trust Everyday Steward advisor, Carol Jackovich, sits down with three female clients of Ronald Blue Trust: Fran LaMattina, Susan Conley, and Kim Wilson. Together they discuss their unique life journeys and share financial wisdom for women walking through singleness, the death of a spouse or a divorce. No matter who you are, there is a lot of wisdom to be found in this conversation. 

To learn more visit http://www.RonBlue.com/women

Join us on our YouTube Channel or wherever you listen to podcasts.
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Ronald-Blue-Trust-105753588582086
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/33670/admin/
Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/wisdom-for-wealth-for-life-the-podcast/id1602381870
Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2CjfTonCCMWYn506kPsylB
Amazon: https://music.amazon.com/podcasts/121d5f25-036e-408f-98c4-d8f35df321cb
iHeartRadio: https://www.iheart.com/podcast/269-wisdom-for-wealth-for-life-90932571/

The information in these podcasts is provided for general educational purposes only.  It is not intended as specific individual advice. The clients’ experience may not be representative of the experience of other clients, and they are also not indicative of future performance or success. Opinions expressed may not be those of Ronald Blue Trust.

Trust and investment management accounts and services offered by Ronald Blue Trust, Inc. are not insured by the FDIC or any other federal government agency, are not deposits or other obligations of, nor guaranteed by any bank or bank affiliate, and are subject to investment risk, including possible loss of the principal amount invested.

Chapters

• 2:04 The stats around women and financial planning
• 2:44 Single women and financial planning
• 6:55 Widowed women and financial planning
• 13:29 Divorced women and financial planning
• 15:39 Resources for women and financial stewardship
• 24:56 Ronald Blue Trust services for women
• 25:42 Advice to the younger women
• 30:03 Advice for women who are searching for a financial advisor
• 36:22 A modern day miracle
• 38:00 How to encourage the women in your life

Transcript

- [Announcer] Welcome to the "Wisdom for Wealth for Life" podcast. Let's bridge the gap between your faith and your finances. At Ronald Blue Trust, we apply biblical wisdom and technical expertise to help you make wise financial decisions. Our goal is to help you leave a lasting legacy. In this podcast, we will hear inspiring stories, practical tips, and encouragement from the Ronald Blue Trust family, with special guests along the way. Welcome to the "Wisdom for Wealth for Life" podcast. The information in these podcasts is provided for general educational purposes only. It is not intended as specific individual advice. The client's experience may not be representative of the experience of other clients, and they're also not indicative of future performance or success. Opinions expressed may not be those of Ronald Blue Trust. In this episode, Ronald Blue Trust Everyday Steward Advisor, Carol Jackovich, sits down with three female clients of Ronald Blue Trust, Fran LaMattina, Susan Conley, and Kim Wilson. Together they discuss their unique life journeys and share financial wisdom for women walking through singleness, the death of a spouse or a divorce. No matter who you are, there is a lot of wisdom to be found in this conversation. Let's listen in now.

- I am thrilled to be here today with three good friends and clients of the firm's. I believe you are going to be encouraged and inspired by their stories, no matter who you are watching this. I also believe their stories might help you understand how you can help others in your life who are faced with similar challenges and opportunities. This conversation with my all-female panel will touch on several topics, but one important one is the unique feelings that women have when it comes to finances. I want to read a few statistics for you from a recent study. 51% of American personal wealth is now controlled by women. 62% of women would like to increase their understanding of financial planning and investing. And only 14% of women say they know a lot about saving or investing. Ladies, I wanna thank you from the bottom of my heart for joining me today. It took us a little while, right? Four or five months to sync up the calendars of all these busy ladies. I'm really excited about this conversation. Fran, welcome.

- Thank you.

- Fran and I go way, way back. She is the one who actually brought me to Ronald Blue 24 years ago. So she used to work at this firm, and I am forever grateful. Fran, you have had an impact on so many women, and you've had a life that maybe wasn't exactly as you thought. And I'd love for you just to share with us kind of what God has brought you through, what God has brought you to, what has encouraged you.

- Well, thank you for having me, Carol. If everybody that I ever brought to the firm was as enterprising and as smart as you are, I would have a great track record here. Thank you.

- But I think, you know, this firm has a wonderful way of hiring really smart and resourceful and helpful people, and you are one of them, so.

- Thank you, thank you.

- It's my privilege to know you. You know, years and years ago when I was single for a long time, and you know, I was never one of these people that was, oh, pining away at not being single. God had been so gracious to me to give me a good education, good contacts. I just never had a problem earning income. But I remember I first read Ron's book, "Master Your Money," years and years ago when I was still working in corporate America, and it just changed my life. I just said, "Oh, I can do this." And from that point on, and I think I was like 28 or 30, I don't even know when I read it, and from that point on, I realized that planning and leading myself financially was a key to success. And fortunately, I got to know Ron and all the people here, and the rest is history. And here I am now in my 70s still working because I love what I do. I coach leaders and and teams to be more effective. And I have had the privilege of referring many, many people to this firm because part of self-leadership is financial leadership. And Susan was one of my referees. And everybody who I've ever referred to this firm has thanked me many, many times.

- Wow, that's amazing. You know, one thing I'm appreciative of, and I know many women are, is that you were so passionate about this. You led a biblical financial study for many women for a long time. And that's how I came to know you and that's how I came here. So tell me a little bit more about that, you know, how God directed you in that area and why you saw it as important and how it encouraged the women.

- I remember, and you know, and I'm sure this is not as pervasive as I felt it was at the time, but I just was thinking so many women were like, "Well, it doesn't matter if I get in debt. It doesn't matter if I don't manage my money. I'm single now. I'm gonna get married and somebody's gonna whisk me away and take care of all those problems I cause for myself." Right.

- And I said, "I don't think that's a good idea."

- Thankfully you were saying that.

- And really when I first was here, I started leading small groups just on financial stewardship. And in those days, it was Crown Financial Ministries. Now a lot of people use Dave Ramsey, you know, and of course lots of services from here, but not everybody even knows about individual planning.

- Right, right.

- But just to get them into the financial stewardship arena. And frankly, you know, we were just dealing with high net worth clients at that point. And Ron was very passionate about helping people accumulate wealth instead of coming here with wealth. And that's when we started the Everyday Stewardship division, and you know, I had the privilege of being part of that.

- That's wonderful. And we're very thankful that you started that.

- It was fun.

- Yes. Well, we're gonna come back to you, Fran, but Kim, welcome.

- Thank you. It's good to be here.

- Thank you so much. So Kim, you have been such an encouragement to me as I have watched you walk through a difficult transition in your life and just be so thoughtful about your stewardship. So can you just tell us a little bit, if you're willing, just share a little bit about your transition, what brought you here and about the journey since then?

- Okay, well, thank you for having me.

- Of course.

- It's good to be here. If something I say today helps someone, that's gonna be wonderful. I had a wonderful life with a husband and two daughters. And six years ago, I got up one morning and everything was normal, and within an hour it wasn't. My husband died very suddenly and my life really changed. I mean, there is just no words to describe how your life just really transitions when your husband dies. And so one of the things that I would say as a Christian woman that I am so thankful for is that in that moment, I realized that God had done things sovereignly for me to prepare me, and I didn't know that he was preparing me for that moment, both financially and emotionally, You know, it's easier to bend your knee to the sovereignty of God when you see that he has already prepared the way for you. And just on Mother's Day, he died in June, and on Mother's Day, my husband had asked me, "What would you like for Mother's Day?" And I laughingly said, because I'm a creative person and not a very organized person, I said, "I need some help with organization. I've got places in the house that are just crazy." And he said, "Great, hire somebody. That's your Mother's Day gift." And so within those just few weeks before he died-

- Wow.

- I reached out to a friend who's an organizer and she said, "Where would you like to organize?" I said, "Well, you know, there's other places I'd like to organize, but my office and our files are probably the most important thing." And so we started working on those and we culled and we found things that were so important. Four days before he died, we finished.

- Wow.

- Unbelievable.

- So on that day, I knew that I knew where the will was. I'm shaking just talking about it. I knew where the will was, I knew where the financial papers were, I knew where the life insurance was, I knew where the mortgage papers, everything I needed was I had just touched it. I knew exactly where it was. It was all organized and ready. And only God could have done that. Also, my best friend, who I trust dearly, she and her husband had been working with Ron Blue Everyday Stewards for years. And I had been talking to her over that past year about I need to get a financial advisor to help us with our finances. And I had not pulled the trigger on that. And just two days before he died, I talked to her and I said, "I need that number of your financial advisor."

- Wow.

- And I knew that it was somebody I could trust because I had watched them walk through, and this was a Christian company who managed wealth from Christian principals. And I had seen her work with them and they were very pleased. So it was a very easy thing for me to trust this contact. And I called her and left the message the day before he died.

- Oh my goodness, wow.

- So in those weeks following, when I had so many decisions to make, so many financial pathways I had to take, money from the life insurance, I had to figure out what in the world to do with. There were so many questions. She was there.

- Wow.

- She stepped into my life at the most critical moment and God had it all teed up. And so I was so thankful for that. And she handed me a wonderful book that helped me through. It literally walked me through everything that I needed to do paperwork-wise, financially right after a death of a spouse. And I am forever grateful that I had that resource.

- Wow.

- Can I ask you a question? I'm really curious.

- Yeah.

- So even before he died, you were thinking, "I need to contact a financial advisor."

- Yes, yes.

- Were you, quote/unquote, "in charge" of the finances in your family? Or was this you feeling like, "I'm just not sure where everything is and, you know, so I think I need to call." What was it, you know, that was prompting you? 'Cause a lot of times I think in a marriage it would be the woman waiting on the man to call. So I'm so curious.

- Well, that's part of my story. I decided a long time ago to be an engaged partner in my marriage, in the financial arena. And I witnessed a woman who had never taken any kind of ownership in the financial part of their marriage, and her husband died suddenly, and she really had no idea how to handle anything. So I was very actively involved. I handled all the bill paying and knew what was in our accounts and where things were and knew about our investments. But the problem was you can get to a point where you know things about investing, but you know just enough to get yourself in trouble. And I tend to be a more emotional person anyway. And you don't wanna be an emotional decision maker when it comes to investing.

- Amen. I might have said that to you. Who knows? That's very important.

- You need a steady hand at the helm that knows more than I knew. And so I realized that that was something that we needed, and so that was why I did that.

- Wow, I love that. All right, we're gonna hear more, but that's just amazing.

- Susan.

- I'm ready.

- Susan, she rocks. So Susan, you alluded to the fact that Fran connected you with me. You were also going through a transition and, you know, that was impacting your finances, impacting everything in your life. So tell us a little bit about your transition and how God walked you through that.

- Thankfully, it's been three years. I don't think I could have been on such a panel any sooner than this. My 26-year marriage did not end like the Disney movies, and I did not get the happily ever after. I worked for it though. Fran was my business coach and life coach, and I left everything on the field. The verse that got me through and still to this day gets me through is the Lord is close to the brokenhearted and he saves those crushed in spirit.

- [Kim] That's right.

- And if you remind me at the end, I can end this podcast with a modern day miracle of how God actually healed my heart. It's pretty mind-blowing and it involves a cardiologist. So it's only two months old, I'd love to share it. But feel free to ask me questions as we go, too, 'cause my head is so full of things I wanna share.

- Absolutely.

- But yeah, the divorce came, and when we were separated for three years, I learned a practice, and that was beginning the day with God. And Martha, Mary, I think most of us know that story. It's the sisters who were hosting Jesus. Martha's running around like a crazy woman as I can tend to do, and making certain everything is just right. And her sister Mary is at the feet of Jesus being still and simply listening and taking him in. And Jesus said to Martha after she complained about her sister just sitting there, Jesus said, "You are worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is needed." And that one thing, every morning sitting with Jesus, saw me through.

- Amazing, amazing. Thank you, Susan. Well, ladies, let's talk a little bit about what kinds of challenges, both financial and otherwise, you faced in your life. I mean, we've talked about it a little bit. And in those challenges, what kinds of resources have you found to make your load lighter?

- Can I go?

- You can go.

- It's a continuation, back to how we all got connected. So when my world fell apart and I came to the end of myself, I think our tendency in the grief times can be to isolate or when heavy life situations happen. I don't know if it's just me, but it is to curl up and isolate, because sometimes it's hard just to take that next breath.

- Right.

- And sorrow, it felt like it was gonna swallow me whole. But I kept going and kept connecting with people. And at that time I was in a small group with Fran and we had had the history of of business and life coaching, and I showed up in her living room. And actually, and the other thing too, I think this back to Disney. I love Disney, but it can paint a picture, a very on-the-surface, wrapped up in a bow, everything's great, everything's fine, put your game face on and go to small group. Well, that night I just couldn't pretend and I shared what was really going on with Fran in her kitchen. And that's when she said, "You must call Carol. You must." And, you know, I respect you so greatly and all of you, just watching you live your life. And as you said how she does, you know, the financial stewardship, and I thought, "Okay, I'll call Carol." But that wasn't good enough for me, because what I do, I interview clients on-

- Yes, I remember.

- You remember?

- I know what you're gonna say, go ahead.

- Was it strange to you that I asked?

- No, I think it's fantastic, go ahead.

- I needed to do a voice of the client report. So I said, "Carol, you're my person, I'm pretty sure because you come highly recommended by Fran, but could I please get three clients to interview?" And so I did. And the end result was a voice of the client report that I do almost, you know, most professional days of my life. And the accolades that came in and the confidence and trust that they have in you and your company, it was mind-blowing. And what's great is three years later, all of those accolades, I read the voice of the client report yesterday, and they are all true for me today. So they all came to be a reality for me, so.

- That's amazing. You are definitely the most thorough researcher of someone that was investigating us. But it was such a blessing to me, too. I loved, I still have it, and I do read it. It's an encouragement.

- Maybe to what you both shared, maybe the reason being it wasn't my department to manage and to lead. I was part of the meetings. But I think because it goes back to Mr. Potts in high school. He taught me algebra and geometry and he was handing back tests, and all the kids, students, my friends were saying what grade they got. You know, "I got a A, I got a B." I'm like, "Oh, what did I get?" I look and I don't have a letter grade, I have a note. And it said, "See me quickly."

- Susan!

- And so numbers are not-

- No.

- Numbers are not my thing. They've never been my thing. But I take good notes and I wanna be a lifelong student. And so you have taught me so much, you have taught me so much, but it's not my department. But now it is.

- That's right.

- But the beauty of you is that you know which is your lane and which isn't.

- That's right.

- And you know, that's half the battle of life is saying, "Okay, this is not, this is an area that I need help in."

- [Susan] Yes, great point. I remember when I first came here, even as a client, I had loads and loads of Excel spreadsheets of what I was managing my money. And I was like, "This is too much work." And I was going to a broker that gave me very sketchy advice. And once I came in here and they said, "Well, you know, you might wanna do this, you might wanna do that," And I was like, "I'm home. I'm where I'm supposed to be. I don't need to be thinking about this. 'Cause even though I'm decent-

- [Carol] It's supposed to make it easier, not harder.

- Yes, exactly.

- Right?

- And even though I like numbers and I'm okay at it, it's not my core competency. So, you know, I've just learned over time, you know, how much time does this take you and how much time would this take a professional? Oh, no-brainer.

- Yes.

- [Susan] It is your core competency, I think.

- Well, I know the principles.

- You're very good.

- I know the principles and the principles definitely are.

- [Susan] Very good. But not the doing of it. And I was doing it and, you know, I'm sure that I would've been much better off. Like just the other day Jeff came, Jeff Chinery is my advisor. Because even though I hired Carol, I also hired him. And it's just a wonderful, wonderful privilege. But he said to me, "I think you could be getting more money if you move just your cash reserves to flourish." And, you know, within a month I was like, "Oh my gosh, I wish I would've talked to him about this beforehand." But so many things that I just don't even realize are just you have to be in this every day. And I like looking at, you know, my statements and stuff. Some people don't.

- Right.

- But, you know, putting all that stuff together on a day-to-day basis, I love that I have people like you and Jeff in my life.

- Well, it's our privilege. It's our privilege. Do either of you have any other challenges that you've faced in your life that you'd like to share about and any resources you've used with those challenges?

- I would just say, goodness, my voice. I would just say that as a widow, you oftentimes have things around the house that your husband would've done.

- Oh, yes.

- To fix, to clean, to do, you know, that maybe are too big, too heavy, too hard, not your lane, as you say, Fran.

- And if you have to pay a handyman to do all those things, it adds up.

- It's a lot.

- And I guess one of the things I'm really thankful for is in the Christian community that widows are often looked after in the sense that, you know, that's something that the Bible teaches, And I'm very thankful that I have had a Christian community in action around me who have come alongside and said, "If you need something like that, reach out." My problem is I don't reach out as much as I need to. And there are things that, you know, it's the honey-do list, you know, and I can get competent. But those are things that I, you know, I know that if I spend the money every time I need something like that, it would be a lot.

- Yeah.

- So that's one of my challenges is learning how to reach out, knowing what to spend on things that I need to have done and how to navigate that.

- And community is so important.

- It is.

- Both of you just said that.

- It's so important.

- I was talking to someone the other day, and they have been in a different city taking care of an adult child struggling with health issues, and they have kind of lost their community. And we were talking about, you know, as they enter retirement, as they get older, they need to establish that community. I know it's been very important to me, important to my parents who are elderly and don't have me around. They have been in a wonderful community that has helped them, and I feel good knowing that their community is helping them, so huge thing.

- And to that point-

- Right.

- I'm sorry, finish your-

- No.

- To that point, you know, I said I just switched over to being in my 70s, you know, to be able to be at this stage of my life and having done financial stewardship right all along is like the greatest way to breathe. I didn't even know how great it would feel, and, you know, to know that I have somebody I can go to all the time for every question, to know that there's gonna be a different way that I'm gonna give in the future than I'm gonna give now, to know that I can give more than I ever thought I was gonna give, to know that I can help people who need help, all these kinds of things. And you know, I've always lived below my needs because I've learned this. It taught me how to delay gratification in so many things. I mean, I remember one day I was talking to Jeff about buying a car and he goes, "Fran, buy the car." I was just like, you know, "Well, should I do this?" And it's just like, I don't make big decisions without help, and I have help, I know that. And because of that I'm just, you know, I'm at a place where I can work or not work, and I could do with the money what I wanna do with it. It's everything that people say in terms of the freedom.

- [Narrator] At Ronald Blue Trust, we believe women have a critical voice in the financial world. For over 40 years we have served in championing women, intentionally including them in the planning process and equipping them with financial knowledge. Please visit robblue.com/women to view our services tailored specifically for women.

- There are so few people, even at my stage of life, who have their mortgages paid off. We've been taught to use other people's money. It doesn't give you that peace that we talk about.

- Right. Well, this is a great lead into the next question I wanted to ask you guys. So what would you tell your 25-year-old or 35-year-old self or maybe other 25-year-old or 35-year-old females out there? 'Cause you were 25 and 35 doing it right. And so now you're here at this point, but what would you tell those just kind of starting out.

- [Kim] That's good.

- You know, give first, save second, and use the rest. You know, that's just the way it is.

- It's not that hard, right?

- If you do that, if you do that, over time you can give more, you can save more, and you can spend less because you're not paying interest, you're not paying, you know, all those fees that just eat away at your, you know, your life.

- Well, and you mentioned delayed gratification. That's one of my big ones. So even when I was in my 20s and I was single, I had roommates, and I could afford not to have roommates. But there were a few reasons. One is I like to be around people and I wanted to be able to continue to feel that I knew how to live with people, which is a big thing when you, you know, start to go off on your own, you can lose that. But the other was, okay, I can use this time when I'm young to save that money, to get that money, whatever it is, and do things that will help me for the future. So I think that delayed gratification is so important.

- It definitely is, no doubt. If I was telling someone, if they were 25, I would definitely say don't let yourself get into debt. And if that means delayed gratification, then do it, because if you can live debt free, you are free.

- Yes.

- Yes.

- And and that was one of the things that so helped me when Bill died suddenly. We had no debt but our mortgage.

- Right.

- None. And, and so I wasn't having to think through about how was I gonna meet all those obligations. And I would say stay involved in your finances if you're in a marriage. Don't just go on automatic pilot and let him handle everything. Because you do need to understand and know where your money's going, how it's being spent, what you're prioritizing.

- And have a voice in it, too.

- And have a voice in it.

- Not just understand and know, but have a voice in it.

- Absolutely, absolutely, yes. So those are things I think are important.

- Those are great. What about you? Anything you'd tell the 25-year-olds out there or 35-year-olds?

- Well, you don't need to know quadratic equations. My CFO dad, I'm haunted by all the math situations I had.

- You really are, you talk about this a lot. We'll talk later.

- Yes, my dad. That's another podcast. But my dad is a retired CFO even now teaches me things about money management and how that all works. He's brilliant in that department. So the financial piece, my parents taught me generosity. I watched how they so generously gave probably because of their great planning. But the piece that was new for me as each decade passed was this whole idea of stewardship, you know, that it's not mine, it's not ours. That was very new. And probably in just the last probably 20 years when we moved to Atlanta and got involved in a kind of a different church and I got my own bible that I actually opened and read, which was amazing. And the fact that it's, you know, you might know where it is, ladies, you know, "Test me in this, give the tithe, and just watch what happens.

- Malachi.

- Malachi?

- Malachi.

- See, I'm still learning all the addresses.

- It's the only verse in the Bible that says test me.

- Really?

- Yes, it is.

- Wow.

- And he is true to his word. And it's just amazing to see. So I would say to my younger self, open, first of all, get a Bible and then open it and read what God says about money. And the other piece, too, is the master of your heart. And money, money's not a bad thing. It is if it masters you. So that, all of God's wisdom in that has been new to me. So I would've said, I would've loved that I would've done that piece later. But hey, that's life, and we learn as we go.

- Yeah, that's awesome. I love it. All right, next question. What is one piece of advice you would give to women out there as they're searching for a financial advisor in making that decision?

- I could tell you what I do 'cause I do it all the time. You know, talk to three people, and you know, talk to people who really care about giving, 'cause a lot of financial advisors, they just care about accumulating wealth and they don't care about giving. And you know, I'm really big on that because I believe that so much happens after that. But I tell them to talk to three people. I always give them your name and I always say, you know, who I use, and I just say choose a person you have chemistry with, somebody that you can trust, because you're gonna be talking to them about very personal things. And if you can't trust that person and you're withholding, you're only hurting yourself.

- That's really good advice.

- That is good advice.

- Very good advice.

- Well, for me, I think it was trying to find someone who was a Christian, who shared the same basic foundational principles. I wanted someone who was in a firm that was a sense of accountability. It wasn't just a lone ranger guy out there managing my money with no one, you know, onlooking. I wanted someone who had a tested track record, and having friends that I have a great amount of respect for who have placed their trust with their money with this firm for as long as they had was a wonderful recommendation to me just by knowing that. So those were some of the things I was looking for, and just being able to trust and work with someone at the level you were talking about, friend, where you're able to tell them all the inside things and feel comfortable about it.

- Yes.

- Yeah.

- And that's so important, right? Because if money is just a tool God has given us to accomplish his purposes in our lives, if you can't be honest with them about what the purposes are and what you're going through, it's gonna be really hard for the advisor to be able to correctly help you with the tool.

- And I forgot to say one other thing, and Susan, I don't wanna preempt you 'cause I'm sure you have great wisdom to share. But the other thing is go to somebody that's gonna do a plan for you. Don't just go to somebody that's gonna manage your wealth, your money. I mean, and that disqualifies a lot of people, and most people are like, "What does that mean?" You really have to explain that and, you know, really establish goals that are gonna help you with all the other things about your life, not just manage your money and get the highest return.

- Yeah, that's great. That's great.

- And you alluded-

- Do you have anything to add?

- Yeah, you alluded to it, and then also you with this, well, a lot of C words come to mind, common ground, chemistry, connection. when you connect with somebody and have that rapport. And it brings up to mind the fact that you and I lived through, you had lived through a divorce.

- Yes, yes.

- And you said, you know, too, your personal and the... I can can tend to be business here and personal here, but all of a sudden it just all washed together and I'm in a fog not knowing what end is up. And the fact that God brought me you, who had not only gone through it, but lived through it and was victorious over the grief and didn't, you know, get swallowed up by the sorrow, it just was amazing. I mean, you were telling me, I remember the first coffee we had, and we didn't talk business, you got to know me as a person. We talked about our similar situations and you gave me Scripture and said, "I'm not gonna lie, this is gonna be really tough, but I'm gonna be with you. But most importantly, God is gonna walk through every step of the way with you." So that piece was pretty powerful. And for me, with my separate departments of life and personal, and business and personal, it just all washed together and you blended it all so extraordinarily well. And then I guess another C word is customized. And even in working with you these last few years, you have changed your approach for me, I'm sure. Carol gives three options for different investment options and they are simple to complex, and we go through them. And I think remember when I said, "Well, I think I'm gonna go with option two." And you're like, "What are you talking about?" But I memorized the options.

- Well, our communication is-

- I can't remember what it's called, but it's the second option on your three options, and it does this, this and this. And she goes, "Oh, you mean the Blackstone " I'm like, "I don't know, but look at number two." So now I get one, two, three, and she even refers to them as, "Look at option three," and I like that. In what I was looking at yesterday in my notes, in one option three, 'cause it usually is the most complex, I crossed it through and it said, "No, never," because I couldn't grasp it.

- I remember you saying that, which is fine.

- If I can't grasp it with a lot of conversation and research and taking notes, and it said, "No, never," so option three is off the table. Forever.

- That's great. I'm gonna go back and look at what option three was to make sure I don't ever pull option three out again.

- But just how you've customized. So the common ground, the connection, and then customizing has just been very, very helpful. Thank you.

- So thank you.

- That's great.

- And the other thing that you guys do so well is the annual checkup. You know, sit down, make sure everything is working, make sure nothing has changed in your life, make sure the numbers are still the same. All of that stuff is just like, you know, peace like a river for me, you know. It's very important to me.

- Yes, that's wonderful. That is wonderful. Okay, ladies, well, I think we're gonna have to bring this in for a landing, even though we could talk all day, so.

- Should I share my miracle?

- Yeah, sure, okay, share your miracle, yes.

- Are we outta time?

- No, keep going, let's share the miracle.

- Okay, I gotta make this quick then. As I mentioned, God promised to be close to the brokenhearted and saves those crushed in spirit. Well, five years ago I ended up in the ER with left chest pains, and they found an aneurysm on my aorta valve, unruptured, because if those rupture, hello, Jesus. I was in Orlando, got back to Atlanta, the cardiologist did all the testing and said, "You need to come back and see me every year." And so my question, thinking I can do something about it, I said, "Can I do anything to reduce the size of this or eliminate it entirely?" And I quote, "The best you can hope for is that it stays the same and doesn't get any bigger." So I went back the last five years. Two months ago I went in for the normal drill, and the cardiologist comes back in and says, "I don't know what to make of this, but it's measuring smaller to the point that I am no longer concerned."

- Wow.

- You do not need to come back.

- That's awesome.

- You do not need to come back. If you could simply do a five-year echocardiogram and if something is seen there, then come back. But Merry Christmas.

- That is so awesome.

- And so God is faithful, he is true to his word, and he not only stayed close to me, but he literally healed my heart.

- Wow.

- That's beautiful.

- Praise God, I didn't even know that. That is amazing. So good to hear your miracle. Thank you for sharing.

- You've had a lot of miracles.

- Thank you for sharing.

- Lot of miracles.

- All right, well, to try to wrap it up, you know, one of the reasons I wanted to get you guys all together is because I felt like you could encourage other women, and, right, we've got a lot of different situations here, a lot of different transitions we've been through, but you could encourage other women. But not only that, even men have a lot of women in their lives, family members, employees, whatever, that have gone through some of these transitions. And so, you know, I think you can encourage other people in how they can encourage each other. So do you have any final words of wisdom and encouragement out there for everybody listening?

- I would say this. I would say most people are really afraid to deal with their finances. It's just like one of those fear things. And until you conquer that fear and until you lay it all open before the Lord, you are not gonna have peace. So I would just say, you know, enter the danger, as Patrick Lencioni says, and do it, and you will reap so much more than you have sown.

- I love that. That's perfect.

- I was just trying to think what I could say. I would say that if you are a married woman, be thankful that you are, and enjoy and treasure that relationship. Plan ahead, have your wills done, have the life insurance in place, have your, you know, bills, you know, don't get in debt, but also trust in the Lord in all of this, knowing that if he chooses to call your spouse home, that he's gonna walk with you every step of the way. I'm gonna get emotional. But he really will. And he will plan, he will carry you, he will provide for you. He will heal your broken heart and he will walk you through. And so just know that if that is required of you, he will meet you there.

- Thank you. Somebody's gonna need to hear that. Thank you, thank you.

- It's very powerful.

- Yes.

- In really echoing what both of you said, in adding to that, you know, somebody hiring well in the financial advisory arena is so critical, especially for someone like me who's not necessarily wired for that. But not only finding a company who can manage the money, but teach the scriptural principles. But I would also add a business that has a heart that cares. And this summer I had a tonsillectomy and a broken arm, and I got in the mail chicken soup from you. And that is-

- I didn't make it, before you get too excited.

- I don't do math or the kitchen. But what is cozier than chicken soup when I was down for the count again? And in that box with all this chicken soup came a soup ladle, and every time I go in that drawer, I just am reminded of God's hands and you and the networking and how I landed with you. And so that soup ladle is just such a reminder to me of we do business, but we're people doing business, and it's business with a heart. And I would add that heart piece to any advisory firm that anybody would go and try and seek out. So, thank you for that.

- You're welcome.

- Because that's more like family.

- You're welcome. You are family. I love that. All right, well, I just wanna thank everyone for being on the podcast today. And if you wanna find more information on financial planning resources for women, please visit ronblue.com/women.

- [Announcer] Thank you so much for listening to the "Wisdom for Wealth for Life" podcast. If you're looking for financial advice, please contact us. Please visit ronblue.com. That's ronblue.com. Thank you for listening, and please subscribe to wherever you listen to your podcasts. Trust and investment management accounts and services offered by Ronald Blue Trust, Incorporated are not insured by the FDIC or any other federal government agency, are not deposits or other obligations of, nor guaranteed by any bank or bank affiliate, and are subject to investment risk, including possible loss of the principle amount invested.